sometimes we can't see what is right in front of us-help for depression

I opened my frig the other day for some creamer for my morning coffee. I looked through the frig and it was nowhere to be found. I thought I had bought some but, well, maybe I forgot. Well... later on in the day, after I had bought some I opened my frig and there it was, the creamer, right in front of me. I laughed at myself at another example of how we sometimes don't see what is right in front of us!
Then..... I started thinking about this happens so often in our lives. My clients often tell me stories that I replay for them, often reframing what they said in a different vantage point. It is often during the reframing their eyes open and they say, "WOW- I never looked at it like that". Sometimes it takes another person to help us see things more clearly. Sometimes the truth is SO in front of us we are blind to it.... maybe we are so used to NOT seeing the truth, not seeing reality as it is.
Sometimes we are afraid to see the truth so even if it right in front of us we can't see it. But.... if we don't see what is really going on- You Can Never Move Forward and Heal.....Please don't be afraid to ask for help to clarify what is really going on.

help for depression- post thanksgiving

Sometimes the days after holidays can feel depressing for some people. Maybe there was conflict at the holiday table, maybe someone drank too much, maybe you ate too much....When we get together for big events it is common to feel excitement and apprehension. Maybe you saw someone you hadn't seen in a long time... Maybe there was someone very important who was not at your table because they died during the year... Well this time of the year can be sad and it can also be a time to look back at this past year and think about what you have accomplished, what you want to continue doing, what would you like to improve on and what can you be grateful for.

This has been a very difficult year for many people. You may have seen loved ones lose alot of money, lose their homes, their jobs.... There have been many, many challenges. But you are still here with the opportunity, today, to continue trying, to continue loving and caring to be open to all possibilities. Today is the perfect time for you to breathe the fresh cool air of a late fall day in Marin. Why don't you try it now. Take a deep whole breathe, hold it and breathe out fully. You can start anew today with this breath.

anxious?

I was thinking as I was running on my favorite trail this lovely, crisp fall day about the trouble we can get into if all we do is focus on our goals and not on the process we take to complete our goals. Sometimes, when you are so focused on getting something done you can forget about all the wonder that is around you while you are getting it done! And this can create so much anxiety for you. Being able to have a deep focus is a wonderful gift and something you can use your whole life-but.... focus should only be a signpost not the trail itself! There is always much more on the trail of life than your goal and focus. Once you stop and look around you will see what there is- a smile of a little child, the smell of a flower, the breeze of coming storm, the touch of your beloved-
Happy holidays and talk to you next week

depression help

What is your philosophy about life? Have you ever thought about this? As I was running on this lovely, sunny day I was thinking about how our philosophies about our lives are usually directly related to religion or spirituality of our childhood. You may not have been told by your parents or your community "This is our philosophy" but most likely you were shown through their actions. When you were young did you see kindness and generosity in your life? Did you see greed? If you saw kindness in your life you most likely grew up with a philosophy that being kind was a positive and important thing. If you were shown greed when you were young , most likely you grew up thinking that "getting one over" on someone was the way to go. The problem is that we did not have a choice as children.

Now, in our lives as adults we can examine our philosophies and understand that we have choices now. We don't have to feel everyone is out to get us or the world isn't fair and we will never get our needs met. We can discover for ourselves who we want to be and start now to grow into our authentic selves. And as we do this we heal and as we heal, depression can lift-move out of our lives.

continued.....stepping on poop...

Many people have mentioned my blog on "stepping on poop" so I thought I might talk more about this! All of us, at some time in our lives, have metaphorically "stepped in poop". What I mean is we have all had painful, sad, upsetting things happen to us in our lives. This is a given. So now that we know this happens we can think about how we want to react and respond to these events.

When I began graduate school I was secretly hoping that I would learn that the way we see ourselves, our lives and others does not relate back to our childhood..

It just seemed like it would easier to heal and change since, for many of us, our childhood is long ago.... But in the ten years that I have been working with clients it is so clear that it really does start in our childhood. That is where we learn how to react to stress, pain and sadness. This is where we develop our sense of self and sense of worth in this world. So.... if you want to change the way you react to "stepping in poop" look at the story you carry about this from your childhood... but don't dwell there.... bring it into the present to find what is true and what is not. You DON"T have to react to stress like you mother or father. This is NOT your truth. When you find your truth, your authenticity, you will be able to survive and be present in this wonderful moment, even if you have poop on your shoe.