Have you ever thought about a thoughtful kind thing that some has done for you or a thoughtful thing someone has said to you and wondered," Maybe I should tell them" ... and you never get around to it? All you would have to do is pick up the phone, text this person or e-mail them and say "thanks" I am not talking about thanking someone for a big act but rather for something small, something that was said or done that was generous, kind, caring. Do you sometimes not even appreciate those small things?
These small moments are so important to appreciate and acknowledge. Especially if you are depressed or anxious you may forget, but the interesting thing about acknowledgment is that it can actually make you feel better. And since feeling acknowledged is a key part of feeling "seen" it will certainly feel good to the person you are acknowledging. I invite you try start.. you may never stop.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Monday, July 5, 2010
help for depression-understanding limits
Sometimes clients come to see me because they feel so overwhelmed in their lives. They are working full time, they have children they are caring for, more and more they are caring for their aging parents-They are very stressed but they don't even know where to begin. Something I learned a long time ago is that you cannot do everything and being everything to everyone.
What are your limits? Have you ever thought about that? Have you been taught that pushing yourself is a good thing? Well, maybe pushing oneself is a good thing because when we push ourselves we are challenging ourselves to do better and we can learn and grow and improve by this. Pushing oneself becomes a problem when you don't know when to stop, when you have spent so much time saying yes to everything and everyone that you don't know how to say No and you are afraid to say no because you don't want to disappoint anyone.
Learning to respect and understand your limits then becomes very important. Understanding that pushing yourself is positive but accepting your limits is even more important. When I say ACCEPTING your limits I do mean ACCEPTING because having limits that you are regretting or feeling bad or guilty about is just as stressful and unhealthy as not setting limits at all.
Part of being able to set and accept limits and about ACCEPTING YOURSELF as you are. Doing more more more is not better. You are OK the way you are.
Listen to your body- the stress of doing more and more weighs heavily on bodies literally-Do you eat more when you are stressed? Do you exercise? Do you take time to relax? Do you feel you DESERVE time to yourself? When you ACCEPT your limits this means you are stopping to take a breath and look around at this precious life. Once you stop, take a breathe, take one thing at a time the grip of "overwhelmness" has on you will loosen and you can begin to feel more in control of your life.
What are your limits? Have you ever thought about that? Have you been taught that pushing yourself is a good thing? Well, maybe pushing oneself is a good thing because when we push ourselves we are challenging ourselves to do better and we can learn and grow and improve by this. Pushing oneself becomes a problem when you don't know when to stop, when you have spent so much time saying yes to everything and everyone that you don't know how to say No and you are afraid to say no because you don't want to disappoint anyone.
Learning to respect and understand your limits then becomes very important. Understanding that pushing yourself is positive but accepting your limits is even more important. When I say ACCEPTING your limits I do mean ACCEPTING because having limits that you are regretting or feeling bad or guilty about is just as stressful and unhealthy as not setting limits at all.
Part of being able to set and accept limits and about ACCEPTING YOURSELF as you are. Doing more more more is not better. You are OK the way you are.
Listen to your body- the stress of doing more and more weighs heavily on bodies literally-Do you eat more when you are stressed? Do you exercise? Do you take time to relax? Do you feel you DESERVE time to yourself? When you ACCEPT your limits this means you are stopping to take a breath and look around at this precious life. Once you stop, take a breathe, take one thing at a time the grip of "overwhelmness" has on you will loosen and you can begin to feel more in control of your life.
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